Life...

Life is so fleeting. Working at the hospital gives you a taste of that, but usually it's the grave illnesses or serious injuries that you're treating, avoiding death at all costs. I never see the other side, the side where life is no more. OT's** usually help you get home or get further help you need to get back home eventually. The thought of those patients dying before getting home usually isn't an issue. I have seen some pretty ill patients, but I never think of them dying, it's always about getting better. Patients discharge and go on with life, and so do you.

My first real taste of death was with Miriam. I didn't know how life could go on. I never thought death would come that close. Other than her, I haven't been that close to death. I know how it feels to lose someone though. It's like your whole world stops. I had such a hard time thinking that life kept going on, despite the fact that my world had stopped.

At the hospital, life goes on. You see a patient, do your best, and move on. You know some patients are seriously ill, but you don't think of them dying.

Then you see a gray, zipped body bag being wheeled down the hallway. Life just stopped for that person. You watch as the transporter slowly walks away and you want to yell, "Wait! There's a person in there!" But you don't, cause there's not really. The person is gone now. It's just a shell.

Your mind flashes to who it might be. That lady from yesterday? That man from two days ago? We tried so hard with them...Did someone hold their hand? Did someone get to push back their hair from their face as they took that last breath? Did they feel it? Did they know it was their last breath? Did the family know? Did they get to say goodbye one last time?

Their world has stopped now. But life....it's still going on.

A new patient is wheeled down the hall. The chimes go off...a new baby has just been born. One life is just beginning, and one has just ended.

It sounds so nice and logical, but what about life for the family who just lost a loved one? When does life begin again for them?

Whoops...time for the next patient.



**Occupational therapists-I'm shadowing, getting experience for grad school.