Wounded Soldier

I don't know if you've ever heard this song before but it's been a huge blessing to me.

Wounded Soldier

You went out to the front lines

Committed to the cause

You fought the fight of faith

You truly gave your all

But now you lie there wounded

With a bleeding heart

You cry for help but help just seems so far

And you wonder where the other soldiers are

I am coming for you, Wounded Soldier,

And I will gently carry you upon my shoulder

I will give you time to mend,

Until you can fight again

There’s no need to fear

I am right here, Wounded Soldier

Sometimes our greatest battles

Are fought within our soul

No one sees your struggles

‘Cause you wont let it show

But you’re the walking wounded

Pretending to be strong

When deep inside you’re barely hanging on

And it’s hard to find the courage to go on

I've always really liked it and always thought of so many other people it applied to until this week, I realized it applied to me.

Somewhere along the road, a few months ago, I got wounded and have been laying on the battlefield, so to speak, dazed and confused.

I've been looking around, wondering where everyone is, struggling to get up and every time, get knocked back down. I felt like giving up. I know I'm Christian, but it's so hard and I'm so busy...

I was confused, scared, but I don't think it ever showed. I do a great job of hiding it. I didn't even really realize I was wounded, or at least, I didn't admit it.

But this week, especially during Wed. night service, it hit me and I realized what was wrong this whole time. This song came to my mind and I've been thinking about it ever since.

It's not easy being a Christian. What makes it even harder is realizing you can't and should not rely on other people for your experience, it has to be a personal walk with God. No friend or family or church member can make you a Christian, it has to be personal to you.

Being confused is not of God. He is not the author of confusion. I am believing that and keeping that in my thoughts.

This last quote I love so much: "It's ok folks, we're Christians!"

May you be blessed and wrapped in His love.

In Which I Rediscover I Am So Not Ready for Kids

I had the opportunity to babysit for a family at church today. They are great kids and I enjoyed it. I had just been thinking last week about how long it has been since I've babysat. Being in college full time and working 2 jobs does not usually leave time, but it worked out today. I went and picked up the kids from the church school and dropped off another on our way home. This kid forgot where he lived but luckily I asked the principle before leaving, if he could tell me. He only knew the general area. Without too much difficulty, although thinking we were slightly lost, we found it. Then on to the border, back into the US. All fine and dandy, except they have these barriers around the exit, and normally when I go through, it's late and it's closed off, but this time it was a zig-zag. I went the wrong way and had to turn around to exit. Slightly embarrassing, but oh well. Then off to piano...

The directions I was given was fine except for one road, which was a crucial one. Thanks to my keen sense of direction and knowledge of county roads, I realized we were going the wrong way and had to turn around. We were about 15 min late for their lesson, but the teacher was late too so it worked out fine. Then I had to figure out where to take the oldest child to her cousin's house to go to her volleyball game. I had no idea where this cousin lived, but due to my handy dandy phone book, I found a county map and figured it out.

We got her there in time and headed on our way home. I was using my trusty map, and drove towards the road that was supposed to connect to the road the kids lived on. Unfortunatley, I have a mini phone book, so the map is shrunk, making the roads look like they connect, when there is about a mile where they do not connect. Lo and behold, it was that mile I was trying to find. So, we had to go way out of our way to get home, but we did make it.

As many of you know, I am not a cook, and decided on mac and cheese with chicken nuggets for dinner. They of course, were thrilled. After some recreation, I convinced them to brush their teeth and we read some books. They were supposed to be in bed by 8, but when their dad came home at 8:45, they were still up. They begged me to stay longer and read more stories, so I did.

All in all, it was fun, and I remember how much fun babysitting can be, but what I loved the most was leaving them with their capable parents and coming home to mine. And I realized, once again, why I am so not ready to be a mom. It's tough!

**What's the photo of, you ask? Why some kind of interesting creature we found lurking in the grass during the piano lessons. The youngest built a home for it in a mole hill, but the ungrateful little creature did not appreciate it.

Some Encouragement

I realized tonight that I've become pretty negative in my thinking lately. Not so much concerning God, but just in everyday life. I'd love to be a lot more positive. Bro. Tom preached an awesome service about encouragement and I remember on my old blog I used to post quotes that I found that were encouraging. So, I thought I'd do that tonight. In case one person reads this and finds some encouragement from it, this is for you!

Catch Up

I have lots of little posts I've been meaning to post the past little bit but most are forgotten. A little recap:

I did go to the Tulip Festival again this year and it was beautiful! I got lots of pretty pictures.

I've been busy working, doing school, homework, and volunteering. I am graduating in Summer!!!! Only 6 credits away from graduating! I can't believe it. I am still debating on whether or not I should walk. It's $40! I think they should be paying me!
Hm...not much else is new, except my bro is graduating from high school in about a month. Totally weird. He's going to be attending my school in the fall. Kinda neat. :)
Oh, I've been enjoying my two Anthro classes. One is boring and so pointless, but we've been having some hilarious (to me) discussions about evolution and creationism and these people who are supposed to be open-minded all gasp when someone mentions that kids at Whatcom actually believe in creationism. It was quite the entertaining day today. :P

Work is as crazy as ever. It must be a full moon soon or something...
That's about it for now. Enjoy some of my tulip photos!

Are You an Adult Yet?

I overheard this conversation between a mom and her son in the library the other day. She was telling her son that adults deal with difficult situations by either laughing or crying. She kept saying to him, "You either laugh or you cry. Adults either laugh or cry."

I thought she was a little odd and did not really agree with her at the time. It was stuck in the back of my head and today I was thinking about a situation and that saying popped into my head: "You either laugh or you cry." I don't know what was wrong with me before, but that is totally true.

The son could not understand his mom's reasoning, and at the time, I wasn't cluing in. She was saying he'd understand when he was an adult. I wanted to tell her I was an adult and didn't understand. But, now I realize I do.

I'm not saying I'm wise and mature, neither am I saying I've experienced a lot of sorrow, but in 2 majorly sad times in my life this saying is completely true.

Sometimes the laughter might seem uncouth or inappropriate, but it's the only way to stop yourself from crying.

Prayer for Our President

Bumper sticker:
"Pray for Obama. Psalm 109:8."

In case you actually look it up and read the following verse(s), I am strictly referring to verse 8. Totally cracked me up. :P

Disclaimer: I mean no disrespect or ill-will. I do pray for our President, and I do not wish him any harm. I only am looking at verse 8. :)
**Update**
After posting the above, I looked on Google and found another funny one.

Superfeet

http://www.superfeet.com/

I was told by my Physical therapist I needed insoles in my shoes because none of my shoes have an arch support. I have fallen arches and have a lot of back problems and my knee is a bit messed up. After a year of her telling me that, I finally went and bought them. I know, I know...

Anyways, they are super cool and I can already feel a big difference. I put them in my shoes and wore them around the house and I could feel my back moving. If you've ever been to the chiropractor you'll know what I mean. I'll keep you posted on how they work. Have you ever tried insoles?